communication

Hearing criticism about your work — whether it's the deck you put together for a presentation, how you ran a sales meeting or the way you interface with coworkers — is tough. It's also impossible to avoid — and that's not a bad thing.

"There is only one way to avoid criticism," wrote Aristotle, is to "do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing."

You are something. You are someone who is doing your best at work. Criticism is a sign that you're actively engaged in the process of trying and improving. Sure, you're thinking. But that doesn't make it sting any less. So how can you handle criticism with the grace of Princess Diana? Some tips from the pros.

Focus on the other person

Surprising, right? According to Deb Bright, head of executive coaching firm Bright Enterprises, which counts Disney, GE, Morgan Stanley, and Marriott among its clients, and author of the book The Truth Doesn't Have to Hurt: How to Use Criticism to Strengthen Relationships, Improve Performance, and Promote Change, the first job of anyone receiving criticism is to make the person giving it feel comfortable.

"Think about it," Bright tells Fortune. "Most managers hate giving performance appraisals, because they dread how someone is going to react to anything negative. So they tend to rush through the discussion just to get it over with."

By shifting your focus off yourself and onto your boss, you redirect your attention away from your emotional response. It's an exciting kind of mental trick, to boot, in that it reminds you of your power in the situation.

"You are the one in control here," Bright says. "How you respond will determine how the discussion goes, and how much or little you get out of it."

Listen

"People often think they're listening when in fact they are anticipating their own response or explanation to the criticism," career coach Ashley Stahl writes on Forbes. Jot down some notes while your manager is talking — the only thing worse than hearing negative feedback is hearing it twice.

Note the difference between fact and opinion:

A fact is quantitative: You missed your sales goal by $20,000. An opinion is qualitative and often vague: You don't communicate well with your peers. As you listen, parse facts from opinions.

Don't take it personally

Opinion, in particular, can be a reflection of the person giving it. Often, what we see in another person is a reflection of something that we are afraid to see in ourselves. This can become a kind of circular realization — your manager is reacting to you based on them, and you're responding to your manager's reaction to you based on you — oy vey! The point is to realize that there is a complex matrix of factors contributing to how we read and are read by others. Understanding that can help you take any opinion-based feedback less personally. What you're hearing is not The Truth from On High — it's your manager's perspective. As Georgia O'Keefe said: "The critics are just talking about themselves."

Hear the value of the criticism

Keep an ear cocked for the feedback that is useful — which is, after all, what feedback is intended to be. "What you can learn in a performance appraisal are things you may need, not just right now, but later on," Bright says. If you've heard the same areas for improvement the past couple of years, chances are you've got a growth opportunity on your hands.

Ask questions

If you're unclear on any feedback, be sure to ask for clarifications, and do so in a positive and specific (rather than defensive) way. For example, "When you mentioned that my data tables were too busy, would it be better to separate the information into sub-tables or do I just need to adjust the presentation style, in terms of font type and size?" You can also ask for suggestions, like, "How can I do this better next time?"

Ask for and provide concrete action steps

Think about how you can address the feedback you've received with a practical fix or two. "For example, you might suggest starting to 'communicate better with your peers' by updating them in person every week instead of through an occasional email," Bright suggests. You can do this at the time of feedback, but this is also a meaningful way to follow-up on a meeting and demonstrate that you've heard the feedback and have an action plan for improvement.

Trust that the feedback is well-intentioned

Nine times out of ten, the feedback is coming from a place of good intention and a desire to help you improve and succeed in your work. If you can remember that, you can see the feedback less as critical and adversarial and can maintain your dignity and self-esteem, notes Stahl.

Say "thank you" at the end of the conversation

"Even if someone is harsh and rude, thank them," writes Leo Babuta at zen habits. "They might have been having a bad day, or maybe they're just a negative person in general. But even so, your attitude of gratitude will probably catch them off-guard." Taking the high road and being the bigger person can win critics over. It's also a way of calming the ego and reminding yourself to be humble.

The takeaway

"No one goes through a whole career hearing only great feedback," Bright says. "In fact, if you haven't heard any constructive criticism lately, it means you probably aren't learning anything."

Roosevelt had some thoughts on this: "It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because this is no effort without error and shortcoming…"

Which all seems like a rather long-winded way of saying: If at first, you don't succeed, try, try again. That's when the magic happens.

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We are creatures of habit, be it in our actions or through our words. And when it comes to words, some common ones threaded together need to be eliminated from the workplace. Commonly used (and often overused) workplace phrases and jargon are not only annoying, but can become meaningless when incorporated into conversation after conversation.

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In fact, as per Independent, "A survey for Wonga.com found that office workers annoy their colleagues at least ten times a day with such phrases. A lot of office jargon seems to act as an intelligence amplifier. We feel that we sound brighter by using a jargon word instead of plain English. One way office jargon does this is by replacing plain, useful, straight-to-the-point-language with language that circumambulates the point."

If you aren't one of those to blame for keeping this practice going, then you've surely been on the receiving end, with an open ear that you wish was stuffed with a wad of cotton. Yet, we have become so accustomed to these phrases and jargon that it becomes something we expect to hear during work calls, meetings, and sales pitches, and read in emails and memos.

What gives? Can't we come up with something new to say? We don't use these phrases and jargon in other areas of our lives, so why are they expected and accepted at work? Before becoming the next person to jump on the irritating conversation-crushing bandwagon, take note of these common workplace phrases and jargon and vow never to utter the words again. You'll not only get your point across with more meaning since most of us have become numb to the sound of these, but co-workers, colleagues, bosses, clients, and staff will appreciate your flair for commanding the English language with a new way of communicating effectively and productively.

"Move the Needle"

You've surely heard this one before, if not once, then many times, as "move the needle" is a workplace favorite. And while the concept – "generate a reaction," as described byMicrosoft – is an important one, why not more directly say, "generate a reaction?"

"Generate" is more powerful than "move," and in 99 out of 100 cases, there is no physical "needle" to refer to when it comes to assessing change.

How about saying, "Let's positively impact or move a project forward," as Cheesy Corporate Lingo writes. The direct and confident nature of such a statement will encourage the team to get to work and make change that is noteworthy and valuable.

So, let's move "move the needle" to the annoying workplace phrases graveyard.

"Thanks in Advance"

"Thanks in advance" is most commonly used in an email situation, but it is wildly overused and must no longer be the closer of an otherwise well-composed correspondence. Essentially, you are assuming that the person you are asking something of will automatically be on board to assist or comply. It is presumptuous and probably not what you intend to convey in the first place, which is thanks for reading my email and considering my proposition.

Academic Workflows on a Macnotes, "I find this trend bordering on offensive. When you ask someone to do something over email by the time they read to the end of the email they have neither done what you have asked nor have agreed. Another problem with this phrase is it implies that your obligation to say thank you is done and you don't need to express gratitude after the person actually does what you have asked them to do." They suggest swapping "thanks in advance" for a more fitting phrase such as,

  • "I really appreciate any help you can provide.
  • I will be grateful if you can send me this information.
  • Many thanks for considering my request.
  • In the meantime, thank you so much for your attention and participation."

So, thanks in advance for cutting this phrase out of your workplace lingo.

"Let's Touch Base"

According toIntelligent Instinct, "'Let's touch base' means roughly, 'Let's get together to review or gauge our current status'." Yet for some reason, saying "let's get together" isn't workplace-savvy enough to fit the bill.

Surely most people don't use this phrase at home – "Johnny, let's touch base after you do the dishes," or "After our Mommy and Me class, let's touch base at the coffee shop and plan Katie's surprise party," so why must we do all this base-touching at the office? Most of us aren't ball players, so there's no reason to round any bases.

As perHubspot, "A Glassdoor survey revealed roughly one in four employees think 'touch base' is the most annoying buzzword. So, if you often toss it around, you might be irritating your coworkers, prospects, and connections."

Hubspot offers some less-annoying "Let's touch base" alternatives that are far straightforward and simple:

  • I'll call you at (date and time)
  • Can we meet for (X minutes) sometime (this week, month, etc.)?
  • Let's meet again in a (day, week, month, etc.)
  • Let's share our progress…
  • Let's catch up…
  • Please call me…
  • Please send me an update/ I'll send you an update…

See, it's easy to "touch base" without having to strike out in your conversation.

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Some other doozies?...

  • "I Don't Have the Bandwidth" – "Something business people say to describe the resources needed to complete a task or project," as defined byUrban Dictionary.
  • "Where's the Value-Add?" – "Term used in service and retail industries, meaning to connect a service or additional product to a product at no immediate cost to the buyer. This cost is often included (read: hidden) in the base price, but is called out to make the customer feel as though they are getting more than they paid for," as per Urban Dictionary.
  • "Let's Circle Back" – "Connecting with folks on a business issue and letting things happen, then going back to them after a few days or after things evolve," as defined by Net Lingo.
  • "Think Outside the Box" - "To think imaginatively using new ideas instead of traditional or expected ideas," as perCambridge Dictionary.

Reboot your workplace vocab and rid yourself of those phrases and jargon that are getting under everyone's skin. "To-the-point" is always better than "What's the point?"

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Almost everyone wants to learn another language, but not that many actually commit to this self-improvement project. This usually comes down to a lack of motivation. It takes quite a bit of time and effort to become proficient in a language and even more time and effort to become fully fluent. Without a concrete motivating reason, many people don't even start in the first place, or become discouraged and give up. But there are many benefits to learning another language, including ones that will very positively impact your career.

1. A second language looks impressive on a resumé.

The most obvious reason to learn a second language is to brag about it. And it is pretty impressive. (There's a reason some people lie about it on their resumé, after all.) It doesn't really matter what kind of job you're applying to, pretty much everyone will give you a second look. Taking the time to learn a second language shows incredible discipline and dedication. It's a decent boost to your resumé, even if you don't really need it for your chosen career path.

2. Knowing more languages significantly increases your job opportunities.

Ever wanted to live in another country? Knowing another language can help open those doors. Rather than being limited to English-speaking countries, you could be able to live and work almost anywhere. For this option, you might want to pick a language that is widely spoken. The first most spoken language in the world is Chinese. Spanish is second and English is third.

3. You can increase your contacts and build more relationships with a second language.

But maybe you don't need new job prospects. Learning another language can probably help you in the job you already have. If you work in business, learning the language most of your clients speak can go a long way to build trust and create long-lasting relationships. The same situation can arise if you're a doctor or nurse. Knowing another language can help even if you're law enforcement. The possibilities are pretty endless.

4. Learning another language improves your memory and decision-making.

Let's say you don't need a new language for any practical reason. Taking the time to study one can still help you immensely. Studies show that there are many, many benefits to becoming bilingual. The ones most applicable in the workplace are improvements to your memory and decision-making. People who know more than one language have to know a lot more vocabulary than monolingual people. Because of this, it's often easier for bilingual people to retain information like phone numbers or grocery lists. When speaking in any language, you have to be careful of what vocabulary you are using when. This kind of decision-making can make you more conscientious on the job.

5. Ultimately, the practice of studying a language can ultimately improve your English.

Studying a foreign language brings your focus to the mechanics of the language, including grammar, conjugations and sentence structure. Being aware of how another language works can also lead to you become more and more aware of how English functions. You'll be more comfortable with the ways it can be structured and how it can be manipulated. These skills can make you a more effective communicator. That's a skill you need in pretty much any career path.

Communication. It's such a vast term that has undergone so many changes in the past few decades. Before the era of the Internet, communication involved playing phone tag all day, sending (gasp!) mail, and hosting clients (double gasp!) in person. Now, with the convenience of email, we can organize our daily communications through our inboxes. But think about how we communicate outside of work. We're talking texting. According to TextRequest, in June of 2014, there were over 561 billion text messages sent around the world. And we guarantee a good percentage of those were sent out during business hours. So how about combining the communication pastime we all love within the office environment? Enter, Slack.

What is it?

Slack is a messaging app that boasts "team communication for the 21st century." With the ability to organize team conversations in labeled "channels," you can speak freely to your teammates without bothering those that prefer the quiet. Public channels are ways for all of your team to chime in, and private channels can be created between smaller groups to brainstorm individual projects. You can also send direct messages to people, just like texting, so you can ask anything to anyone you need.

But Slack is much more than just a way for you to annoy your coworkers all day with requests work-related and not. It's also a way to share files including images, PDFs, documents and spreadsheets, which you can then star or comment on. It's also compatible with Box, Google Drive, and Dropbox, so you can search directly for the documents you seek.

Why use it?

If you're one of the people that likes seeing their inbox full of thousands of messages a day, Slack may not be for you. But for the rest of us, Slack is a great way to get important messages out promptly (with desktop notifications) that free up our inboxes from unnecessary fluff. It also builds camaraderie! The #random channel allows you to get your fill of after-hours banter when you need a pick-me-up or a funny meme to get you motivated. Off your desktop, the Slack app keeps you updated on the run!

The best part

Slack is totally free for teams of all sizes for as long as you want! That makes it a risk-free system to integrate into your workplace. If you're interested in more cool features and controls, of course there is a paid standard and plus plan, which can give you group voice and video calls, more storage, and user provisioning and deprovisioning.

Slack has been known to increase productivity by providing workers with the chance to communicate faster and more efficiently.

Want to learn more about Slack? Click here!