gifts

When people think of gifting, they tend to think of the winter holiday season.

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"It's the most wonderful time of the year," Andy Williams sings in the classic carol, but it's also the most expensive. Between hosting and attending holiday parties (wine for the hostess! new sparkly top!), gifts, and travel, the bill for holiday bliss can be a big one, which leaves you with more than family dynamics to stress about. (Most Americans rank holiday shopping as more stressful than traveling or spending time with extended family, according to a survey from e-commerce platform Needle.)

And here's what makes it worse: in a study from Credit Karma, more than half of respondents said they'd impulse-shopped to deal with feelings of stress, anxiety or depression.

"Stress spending is a bit like having coffee while you are stressed: It's an impulsive behavior that you think will calm you down, but all it does is make you feel even more jittery and anxious," Teodora Pavkovic, a psychologist and life coach tells NBC News.

"It's a vicious cycle because our excessive holiday spending plunges us deeper into debt, which then increase our feelings of fear, anxiety, guilt and shame," says Kelli Saginak, a life coach and professor, told the site.

Online spending in the U.S. is likely to grow nearly 15 percent in 2018 to a total of $124.1 billion. That's a lot of Tickle Me Elmos and Fidget Spinners. But don't worry, you can keep your holiday spending in check by avoiding these pitfalls.

You Don't Make a Budget

Savings for Christmas ShoppingClark & Washington

Got a holiday budget of $1,000? Sorry, that's not good enough. You also need to break that number down by person, Zaneilia Harris, author of Finance 'n Stilettos and president of Harris & Harris Wealth Management told US New and World Report. "The more organized you are and the more detailed you are, the better," she says.

It sounds like a job for excel, advises financial columnist Liz Weston. "Spreadsheets aren't exactly warm, fuzzy and cinnamon-scented," she wrote for the Associated Press. "But they allow us to see our total expected holiday spending and to make adjustments as necessary. (Adjustments are always necessary.)"

You Lean Hard on Credit Cards

Money Crashers

"Tons of research shows that people spend more money when they charge things," Kit Yarrow, professor emeritus at Golden Gate University and author of Gen BuY: How Tweens, Teens, and Twenty-Somethings Are Revolutionizing Retail told BankRate. "If you can pay with cash, you'll always be a little more aware of what those gifts cost."

You Let Your Emotions Get the Best of You

Timeline

Guilt gifting. Fear of missing out on a flash sale. When will turntables ever be this cheap again?!? Don't make yourself susceptible to the psychology of shopping.

If someone who wasn't on your budget gives you a gift, respond with a really thoughtful card or homemade gift—not by buying them an impulse bottle of fine Champagne. You want to show you value them, but that doesn't always require spending.

"What people have to remind themselves of is that money doesn't equal love or affection," Yarrow said.

Fire sales can also tap into our lizard brains and our fear of scarcity. Black Friday sales and weekend specials create emotionally charged and stressful shopping situations, and a fear of missing out can override common sense. "When everybody is grabbing for something, we feel we should be grabbing for it, too" she said.

Furthermore, don't let yourself be seduced by slashed prices and big savings, warns The Motley Fool. "If you buy a $500 dishwasher for $300, don't look at it as saving $200, view it as spending $300."

You Forget the Value of a Homemade Gift

Food in a Minute


"For some people, their love language is receiving things," Michelle Singletary, author of The 21-day Financial Fast: Your Path to Financial Peace and Freedom, told BankRate. Who's to say that "thing" can't be a homemade thing?

You can go big with a knit scarf or crocheted hat, or small with cookies, chocolate bark, jams, granola, homemade bread, soaps or candles. What about making beautiful, abstract watercolors and buying frames at Ikea? Aren't these gifts way more thoughtful than an Amazon gift card?

Or what about thoughtful vouchers? The parents of two-year-old twins will be overjoyed at a coupon for babysitting and your best friend would likely love lunch on you and a trip to the art museum.

You Fail to See the Big Picture

Small Business

A guaranteed way to spend your holidays feeling drained is to spend the next six weeks at the mall, looking for parking, and elbowing fellow shoppers out of your path at Williams-Sonoma. What makes the holiday season memorable is all the other stuff: fires, time with loved ones, twinkly lights, rich hot cocoa, and festive events.

Kelli Saginak suggests thinking about how to create a meaningful holiday season "with minimal stress on you, your body, and your bank account.: Ask yourself:

  • How do I really want to feel during the holidays?
  • What type of holiday do I really want to create and experience?
  • What conscious responsible actions will allow me to spread holiday cheer, lower my stress and not add to my money problems?

Celebrating is not the same as shopping, Mary Hunt, founder of DebtProofLiving.com and author of 7 Money Rules for Life, told Bankrate. What we enjoy is the ceremony and the feast of the senses.

"The sights and sounds of Christmas were the reason [my family] loved the mall," Hunt says. "So I would just take a few bucks in my pocket to get a hot chocolate and a cookie. Our purpose was to go see Santa, or to go see the decorations and ride the train." She also remembered the most memorable year being the cheapest.

"The best Christmas we ever had was when we decided to spend $100. The $100 goes fairly quickly. So what do you do for the rest of the season? You visit, you make hot chocolate. We spent the holiday with people and not in the stores. It was, by far, the best holiday ever."

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Valentine's Day is the pinnacle of romantic holidays — today's the day you get to show all the love you have for your significant other in the form of gifts or experiences. It's a bit materialistic yes, but everyone loves feeling special and being showered with presents! However, if your budget's a bit tight, it can be hard to show your partner you appreciate them. So, we've compiled a list of five tips you can use to ensure that you have an amazing Valentine's Day without spending that holiday money.

1. Make sure you buy flowers the right way

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Don't get cheated and buy your flowers online for delivery — even if they're ensured fresh and come with discounts, shipping trucks don't come with refrigerators. So if you order from a company with a warehouse far away from you, they might be wilted by the time your SO sees them.

Instead, get your flowers from grocery stores or the florist — both will keep their flowers cold until pick up time and some florists would even deliver in a chilled van. Be sure to ask for flowers that haven't quite open yet — that way they'll bloom in the hands of your SO and will keep for days.

2. Don't skimp where it doesn't count

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A definite no-no is buying flowers from the side of the road — even though they're the cheapest, they definitely won't last more than a day. These flowers also won't come with flower food nor replacements if they turn out to be spoiled.

Regarding dinner, don't order cheaper foods just because you need to save money — worrying about money every step of the date will definitely spoil your night.

3. Eat at home

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Come to think of it, spend your special night at home instead of a kitschy Valentine's Day restaurant. Even if it doesn't seem that special, eating at that dining table you never use or in front of the fireplace, or even in bed will give it that special feel.

Light some candles, throw around a handful of rose petals and put on some Frank Sinatra — your SO will definitely give you brownie points for your thoughtful DIY.

4. Order smart

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If you're bent on going out for dinner, you can totally pull that off too — one tip is to go for the cheapest champagne or Prosecco. No one can really tell the difference between expensive and cheap champagnes so there's really no use ordering the one that's going to break bank.

If the night is going to end in romance, be sure to order light. Not only will it stop bloating, but lighter dishes will also be less expensive — choose fish over steak, or sorbet over chocolate mousse.

5. Do your research with jewelry

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Look online for the jeweler with the best prices, but never buy online — it's much better to go in store to make sure that ring or necklace looks the way it's supposed to. Also be sure to check its certificates — this is to make sure the piece will last for a long time, not something you should obsess over.

Now that you're equipped with all these tips, enjoy your day of romance with your SO — and don't forget that this holiday is for love first and foremost. Even though you're encouraged to splurge a bit, losing sight of the spirit of Valentine's Day will definitely screw you over.

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So, I'm new to the "living on my own" game and let me tell you — it's been a pretty big struggle. I really never understood how much the little things cost until I moved out a couple years ago. That being said, I will take free things whenever I can get them.

Maybe you're already established and comfortable in your life — good for you! However, it's still useful to ask for things that you would otherwise have to buy for Christmas. Hey — I didn't want to be an adult either, but that's just the way things are.

Whether you're a young adult or a fully fledged old person, here are five major categories of presents you should definitely include on your wish list.

1. Kitchen supplies

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Not only are quality pots and pans super expensive, but the little things count too — cutlery, appliances and tools all add up. Putting big items like a food processor or a slow cooker on your wish list takes the hassle and anxiety out of buying one for yourself.

Not to mention, kitchen supplies will last you pretty long — unlike that bottle of brandy you and your cousins killed in one night.

2. Music or movie and TV subscriptions

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Music, movies and television are all consumed by subscription nowadays — I couldn't live without my Spotify, Netflix and HBO GO. Asking for a year's — or a couple years' if it's cheap — subscription to an online streaming service will save you a ton of money.

Let's face it — we can't keep mooching off of our family's accounts or creating new identities for free trials. So ask for a Netflix subscription instead of expensive headphones you can get super cheap knockoffs of.

3. Warm clothing

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Yet another unexpected expense in adult living — warm coats are expensive but absolutely needed for the northeast weather. Asking for a nice wool pea coat or a faux fur lined trencoat will ensure that you'll be toasty warm for years to come.

Heck, why not even socks? Being the butt of so many Christmas jokes, it's time that warm, fuzzy socks made its comeback. Both your feet and your bank account will thank you.

4. Gym Membership

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Ah yes, time for the dreaded New Year's resolution — instead of wasting your own money on a gym membership you'll only use two weeks into the year, why not ask for one instead? This way, maybe you'll even feel guilty for not going and continue your doomed resolution.

Memberships are also usually on sale this time of the year — praying on the weak, no doubt. But who knows? Maybe you'll actually stick it out this year.

5. Money towards an investment

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Do you have student loans creeping up behind you? Need to pay the rent to your swanky Brooklyn apartment soon? Why not ask for straight-up money for Christmas? Yes, it seems like a pretty shallow thing to do, but the holidays are for giving!

For my birthday, I asked my parents to pay that month's rent so I would be worry-free and spent my money on other things I had been putting off. It's not the most heartfelt present, but to me, paying off someone's debt is pretty huge.

Of course, this list is definitely for families that are well-off or at least lower middle class. If your family and friends can't afford these things, don't be distraught if they buy you a cheap present or none at all. It's important to keep in mind that the season is about coming together — while gifts are just an add-on.